Saturday, September 5, 2009


5th Aug'09

I'm home...
But seems like no one are happy because I'm back.Even mum...
Some more show angry face.
As a daughter come back to home doesn't should feel excited and happy mah?But I feel regret to come back.No meaning that I'm coming back. Better stay in Kampar.
Mum's angry face didn't lost in a minute.
After Kai leave,she start shoot me...
I keep scolded by her,I feel that myself like a dog scolding by my owner.
I keep silent and cry.Even something in my heart I can't tell my mum,course she wont understand what am I thinking.What she say I just obey and follow then I wont get any scold and safe.But I lost my freedom to open my mouth.
Plus,she want me to give up take part in "ifeel girl search 2009".What respond should I give her?Yes?or No?This is my chance,my experience,and my memories.Now I'm the finalist,how many people want this but didn't success.I'm one of the lucky one.Why don't let me keep it on?Before I pass the register form,I get her permission and she was support me,but now...Also she want to stop me every thing.Don't she think about my feeling before?
I want to tell my mum,what you say is not 100% correct,please listen to us too.Maybe this is the way we can keep closer and know more about us and what we thinking and what we actually
I'm crying... ...
I'm thinking,why my mum never sit beside me and listen to my secret.My friends told me their mum will,this let me feel they are so warm and take their mum as their friend.Before this,I try to do that too...but reality tell me CAN'T!!!
My mum is mum,we cant be friend.Which mean between us there is a wall,the wall we cant see and touch,only me can feel.